Driving in Europe

This seems to be a popular subject for articles giving advice on motoring matters, so we thought we would add a few of our own little tips regarding some of the idiosyncrasies of our foreign neighbours.

France

Do not fall out with the police. They are humourless and potentially very unpleasant.

They also carry guns. If you get shirty with them they will take them out and point them at you. (Just for going the wrong way down a one-way street......)

Germany

Driving in Germany is ok. They drive fast, but they follow the rules and tend not to do stupid things. If you are hiring a car remember that the sliproads are short and often uphill. Getting up to speed to join a busy autobahn in a fully laden 1.2 Punto or some such requires determination. Opt for an upgrade to something with a bigger engine.

Austria

Like Germany but with more trees.

Italy

You will rarely see a patch of road in Northern Italy without a car on it.

Three things to remember, 1.Except on the autostrada your average journey speed will never exceed 30 mph. 2. Your fuel consumption in a small car will be around 20mpg (because you are always in second gear) 3.There is absolutely nowhere to park, anywhere, ever.

Southern Italy has less traffic, but it doesn't have any straight roads, so it still takes forever to get any where.

Portugal

Portugal doesn't have all that much traffic, yet it has one of the highest road death rates in western Europe. This may be because the Portuguese will always try to pass the car in front (and then the car in front of that, etc.) This can be risky as every vehicle seems to be cruising at its maximum speed. Keep a low profile and let them get on with it.

Spain

I once inspected a rental car I was picking up at a Spanish airport and noticed a dent on the wheel arch.

I brought this to the attention of the attendant who shrugged his shoulders and indicated a row of similar vehicles, "They've all got dents." he said sadly.

Malta

You can do pretty much what you like here. The heat even makes the police apathetic.

Switzerland

Do not exceed the speed limit. Do not disobey the parking regulations. Do not ignore lines painted on the road. Do not ride a motorbike. Do not let your windscreen get dirty. Do not go to Switzerland.

Belgium

If your car is clean the Belgians will stop and look at you.